Week of November 24, 2002
‘I’ve tried being nice, but that doesn’t work. Now, tell me–When does Book Five come out?!?’
Albus: Now, Miss Granger..You know perfectly well that skirts as short as those are completely against school regulation!
Hermione: But Professor, those robes leave nothing to the imagination!
Albus: Fine, but only this once. We wouldn’t want Professor Sprout to turn up with them next…
Albus: When did you get here!?!?
-Dan and Nick
‘Severus! Look at this line! Next time, order Harry Potter tickets off of Fadango.com!‘
‘Sprout, back up two steps please. Heh, you’re in my bubble…’
‘Alright, whoever decided to host a Victoria’s Secret fashion show in my school, is going to be expelled!‘
Albus: Do I even look like Gandalf?!? I swear, if I get one more owl about LOTR…..
Frodo: Gandalf! The two towers have risen!
Albus: Severus, what did I tell you about writing on the walls?
Snape: Er… Don’t?
Albus: That’s right! Go to your dungeon!
Snape: But.. But it wasn’t me!
Albus: I said go!
Harry: Professor! I swear I didn’t write…
Albus: That is such beautiful handwriting! Will you teach me how to write that way?
Albus: Sprout, did you touch my behind?
Sprout: No? Who just touched my behind?
Snape: Professor Flitwick just ran that way!
Albus: What are you all so scared about? It’s not written in blood!
Sprout: Actually, sir, it is.
Albus: And that’s my problem?!
For the last time, Riddle, stop putting the ‘I smell’ signs on my back! Don’t tell me it wasn’t you; I can see right through you!’
‘Do I smell cabbage?!?’
Albus: Yes, that is indeed the stench of evil in the air…
Sprout: He’s always blaming his bowel movements on evil…
Albus: Ronald, your Chamber of Secrets is open…
Ron: Ah! :ears turn pink and zip:
‘Peeves, get out of here! They cut you out of the film after you ate it, remember?’
Albus: Could you read that for me, Minerva?
McG: Can’t you read, Albus?
Albus: Er… Aberforth can’t either!
Snape: Then how did you decide our salary?
Albus: Six-sided die… Best two of three…