Week of December 15, 2002
‘That darn poltergeist switched the tp with sandpaper!‘
Quirrell: Dumbledore! I just saw the second movie and… I’M NOT IN IT!‘
Albus: But remember, Professor, you died at the end of the first movie…
Harry: How’d you come back anyway?
Quirrell: very suspiciously* I have my ways….
The Daily Prophet Reports: Despite how long he ran, it wasn’t long before Professor Quirrell was arrested by the fashion police and charged with acts regarding his turban.
‘Hurry! Hagrid’s eaten one of the Olsen Twins!‘
Hermione: What’s wrong with Professor Quirrell?!?
Harry: I don’t know, but he should be the new sports teacher; did you see how fast he ran in here?
Quirrell: Basilisk, basilisk in the dungeon!
Albus: ..Next year, professor…
Chris: Quick! Cue in Vangelis!
‘Plunger! Where’s the Plunger?!?’
‘I’m beating Snape in the 100 meter dash!‘
‘The Amerians are coming! The Americans are coming!‘
‘Do NOT – go in there!‘