Week of April 20, 2003
Mr. Weasley: So when did Hermione show her first signs of magic?
Mr. Granger: When she was six… I asked her to put a book down…
Mrs. Granger: She didn’t like that at all… she started screaming, and then the table cloth caught fire!
Mr. Granger: Then the eggs started chasing me around the house!
Mr. Weasley: Really? The same thing happened with us and Ron! Except.. we asked him to pick up a book…
Mr. Weasley: And then there was this one time…
Mr. Granger: *under breath* okay.. on the count of three.. we’ll run for the exit! 1….2…
Mr. Weasley: So, how does a car work?
The Grangers: We don’t know…
Mr. Weasley: How does a computer work?
The Grangers: We don’t know…
Mr. Weasley: How does a camera work?
The Grangers: We don’t know, how come you ask?
Mr. Weasley: I just saw a mysterious flash…
The Grangers: Hi, Eric!
Mr. Weasley: You say you’re Muggles? How fascinating! So, you must know all about eckeltricity!
Mrs. Granger: *small smile*
Mr. Weasley: I myself spent months studying light blubs…
Mr. Granger: *bites lip trying not to laugh*
Mr. Weasley: …Last year I taught my son, Ron, how to use a fellytone…
Mrs. Granger: *covers mouth sniggering*
Mr. Weasley: Soon, we’ll move onto the compoopiter…
Mr. Granger: Hehehehe….
Mr. Weasley: …In a few weeks we should be connected to the intranect, too!
The Grangers: *rolling on the floor* PWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Mr. Weasley: Mr. Rogers!? Is that you?! Oh my gosh! I am your BIGGEST fan! I’ve been watching your show since I was a little boy! ‘It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood!’ I even named one of my sons for you! Fred, get over here a minute! I can’t believe I’m actually meeting you! it’s such an honor to be meeting such a famous and influential person!
Mr. Malfoy: But you don’t care about meeting me?!?
Harry: I’m famous, too!
Mr. Weasley: Hello, my name is Arthur Weasley. I collect plugs.
Mr. Granger: Hello, we are Hermione’s parents. We collect funny looking hats… how much do you want for that one?
Mr. Weasley: How about a rubber duck?
Mr. Granger: Deal!
Mrs. Granger: What an idiot…
Mr. Weasley: …What’s so funny?
The Grangers: ….
Mr. Weasley: Why are you laughing at me?
The Grangers: …
Mr. Weasley: Oh, I get it. You can’t say anything because nobody knows who you are or why you are here!
The Grangers: *nod*
Mr. Weasley: Well.. nice to meet you!
Arthur: It’s NOT funny!
Mr. Granger: teehee… Rubber Duck… *cracks up laughing*
‘And what exactly is so funny about my hat?’
Mr. Granger: So then the duck says ‘Put it on my bill’! *laughs*
Mrs. Granger: *laughs a little*
Mr. Weasley: …I don’t get it…?
Mr. Weasley: What’s that you’re holding, Mr. Granger?
Mr. Granger: Oh, It’s Eric’s birthday present!
Mr. Weasley: Oh! What did you get him?
Mr. Granger: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix!
Mr. Weasley: …Isn’t that supposed to come out in June?
Mr. Granger: Ah.. yeah.. but.. Barnes and Noble didn’t have good security, so it wasn’t hard to get!
JK Rowling: Mr. Granger! That’s it, you’re dying in Book Six!
Maybe we can double date some time!
-Gina and Kayla
-To get to the other side! HA! Get it?
Mr. Weasley: Did you know that your daughter dumped my son for a Bulgarian Quidditch player?!? Ron is much more handsome and his nose isn’t even broken!
The Grangers: *snickering* I’m sure our daughter meant.. nothing by it…
Mr. Weasley: Well I certainly hope not! It’s not every day a lady can find a quality man who can pull such comical faces!
‘Now I’m wearing ‘Barbie’ Underwear. Tell me, what exactly do you Muggles use it for?’
Mr. Weasley: So, what exactly is the function of ‘the pill’?
Mrs. Granger: *looks at the several Weasley children* well.. um…
-Rowena and Amanda
‘So you’re dentists? Can you show me how that little drill thing works?!’
Mr. Weasley: So, you’re Hermione’s parents!
Mrs. Granger: *coughHATcough*
Mr. Granger: *nodding and trying not to laugh*
‘Hey! Where’d you guys get those outrageous Halloween costumes from?!?’
Mr. Weasley: Ya know, that mudblood of yours has really developed since last year!
The Grangers: ?!?!
Mr. Weasley: What?!?!?
The Grangers: *laughing* Nothing! Nothing!
Mr. Weasley: Why are you laughing?!?
Mrs. Granger: *smiling* no reason…
Hermione: *walks up* Why do you have a ‘kick me’ sign on your back, Mr. Weasley?
The Grangers: Hermione! SHUT UP!
Mr. Weasley: It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood!
Mr. Rodgers: Hey! That’s supposed to be my line!
Mrs. Rodgers: Now calm down, Dear, you don’t want to get hyper from that bag of sugar you just ate!
Mr. Weasley: Well, you know, my son, Ron, has the hots for your daughter Hermione!
Mr. Granger: Really? We didn’t know that?
Mr. Weasley: Oh no? Call the two kids here! Ron!
Ron: What, Dad?
Mr. Weasley: Tell Mr. Granger your intentions with his daughter!
‘I’m sick of all these people complaining about not getting speech bubbles. Back in my day we never had speech bubbles!’
Mr. Weasley: Hermione tells me that you’re dentists!
Mr. Granger: Yes, we are.
Mr. Weasley: Fascinating! W..What’s a dentist?
Mr. Granger: *sniggers* We cut peoples’ tongues out!!!
Mr. Weasley: *Pulls out wand and letters appear* Eric forgot the speech bubble again!
Chris: Eric! How could you forget it again?!?
Eric: I told you! A Speech Bubble is not within limits of the budget this week!
Mr. Granger: Boy do you remind me of the Pillsbury Dough Boy!
Mr. Weasley: ‘Pillsbury Dough Boy’? Is that a Muggle thing?
Mr. Granger: Why, yes *pokes Arthur’s stomach*
Mr. Weasley: *Giggles insanely*
Mr. Weasley: You must be Muggles!
The Grangers: Yes, we are.
Mr. Weasley: Fascinating! I have a few questions for you, if you don’t mind…
Mrs. Granger: Certainly!
Mr. Weasley: So.. Why do you drive on parkways and park on driveways?
Mr. Granger: Erm…
Mr. Weasley: Why do they call it a ‘TV Set when you only get one?
Mrs. Granger: ….
Mr. Weasley: When, exactly, do the cows ‘come home’?
Mr. Granger: ……