CC #113: Week of December 19, 2004

CC #113: Week of December 19, 2004

Week of December 19, 2004

This is what became of the old wizard in Bath who had a book that he could never stop reading. As you can see, he is still doing everything one-handed.

‘I’m getting too old to turn my cup… where was that turn back time spell again?’

Even though Bob could magically move a spoon without touching it, he had no idea how the universe was created.

Peter Parker: Fifteen years from now. What, can’t you see the web in his cup of tea?

Harry Potter and the Year He Grew Up Fast.

‘Wow, this ‘’tea from your fingertip” spell actually works. Lipton won’t like this…’

Man: ‘This Stephen Hawking guy is full of it. Honestly, a Muggle thinking he knows the origins of the universe!’
-Matt N.

Stan: *Popping out of book* What ‘choo drinking?
Man: *Tosses book out* Last time I buy a realistic pop-up book from Flourish and Blotts…

He was so fascinated by the chapter on Black Holes that he didn’t realize his finger was peeing milk.

Most movies advertise something ‘cool’ like Pepsi or Abercrombie. However, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban is a unique movie because director Alfonso Cuaron has successfully sneaked in advertising for a book.

Starbucks conquers the Wizarding world after running out of space in the Muggle one.

Man: Hmm… *glances at cover* ‘A Brief History of Time from the Beginning to Black Holes…’
Man: Hmm… *glances at cover* ‘A Brief History of Time from the Beginning to Black Holes…’
Man: Hmm… *glances at cover*
Guy Nearby: Must be one of those darned enchanted books…

‘Quantum Physics… black holes… string theory… subatomic particle interaction… worm holes… my goodness, this Muggle just figured out the Floo Network!’

‘The Big Bang? Quantum Physics? Unification Theory? These Muggles have the most harebrained ideas. Everyone knows the universe was actually created by J.K. Rowling.’

Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
Black has escaped,
To come after you
*Points to Harry*

Many people were upset with PoA, believing that Alfonso didn’t exactly stay on topic. What they failed to realize is that Alfonso actually read the wrong book.

Mr. Anon: *Reading to Ron* According to Stephen Hawking, if you kick a cat in space, no one will hear it scream.
Ron: Oy, Hermione, can I borrow Crookshanks a moment?
-Chris and Mela

‘It’s amazing how I need to say the same incantation over and over to keep this spoon moving, while Lupin doesn’t need to move his lips at all to do the Patronus Charm…’

Man: ‘Look! I’m multi-tasking! I can read, stir my coffee, and practice kissing at the same time!’

‘And if I’ve followed these instructions correctly, there should be a mini universe in my coffee cup…’
-X Offender

‘Ah, who’d have thought that a one-time Stone Roses groupie would have become a top-selling author who’d give me a cameo in the movie version of her best book…?’

‘Okay, so it’s one turn backward on my Time Turner to reheat the coffee or two turns forward for an iced cappuccino…’
-Jen G.

Eric: ‘If I get ONE more freaking Guy/Spoon Shipping Caption I’ll… I’ll.. I’ll really make that marquee give you all a tumor!

Got Magic?

Even the Wizarding world is not safe from pretentious coffeehouse patrons.

Man: Waiter?
Waiter: My name is Eric; can I be of service to you?
Man: Yes, there is a fly in my soup!
Eric: Come on, people! Get creative! Do you know how many entries said that?
Man: The same as the number of flies you put in the soup?
Eric: …
Man: …
Eric: …
Man: So… are you gonna do something about this?
-Bradley C.

‘Ohh! So that’s the function of a rubber duck!’
-Alastor Cruise

Title of book behind ‘A Brief History of Time’: ‘1001 Surefire Ways to Get Eric to Pick Your Caption Finally!

‘Amazing, how Hawking condenses millions of years of existence into a tome 1/28th the size of OotP!’

J.K. Rowling: My favorite scene…
Alfonso Cuaron: Mine, too…

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