CC #273: Week of July 13, 2008

Week of July 13, 2008

Ron knew he was doomed when he discovered that the Slytherins had Tom Brady and Randy Moss in their Chaser group.

Ron: ‘Bloody Hell! This is the LAST time I let Mum dress me for Quidditch. I’m wearing a corset!

Ron: *Thinking* I’m so nervous for my first Quidditch match! Especially since my first one was supposed to be LAST year…

Ron: *Thinking to himself* Oliver would look so much better in this uniform.
Everyone: *Thinking to themselves* Oliver would look so much better in that uniform…

Ron: Why am I the only one who has to wear all this stupid protection gear, Harry?
Harry: Because, as Keeper, you’ll have balls flying at you at 200km/h and you have to block three goals at a time.
Ron: …

Ron: ‘It’s King Ron, actually. Just ”King,” though. Harry’s the High King. I know, it’s confusing.’

Ron: Um, you’ve got me wearing the helmet and chest padding because you want me to be extra protected, right?
Random Boy: Actually, our last Bludger broke. Fred and George volunteered you as a replacement.

Ron: Harry, you should have told me that it wasn’t fancy dress…
Harry: It’s basically initiation to the team, and besides, I didn’t know you were going to come dressed as a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle…

Rupert’s new movie: Friday Night Flights.
-Beth Clark

Ginny has a ‘wardrobe malfunction’ during her part of the Half-time Show.

Rupert: *Thinking* I think WB just likes to make me feel stupid…

Ron: I just had to ask why wizards have cannons when they already have bludgers.
Filch: *Off-screen* That will teach you to question how I do my job!
Ron: I didn’t question you! And I didn’t volunteer to be the human cannonball!
Filch: And see that you’re here every dawn at six a.m. to signal the start of the academic day!

Ron: ‘I didn’t want for it to come to this, but WB hasn’t given us a trailer, and it’s time to take action…’

Ron: ‘I can’t decide what’s worse – how I play, or how I look?’
-Ian R.

Malfoy: ‘Nice bra, Weasley!’

Ron: *Turns around, angrily* ‘Watch your stick, mate! I’ve got bad luck with wooden sticks! They always seem to *gets hit in the face* …do that.’

Hermione: *Laughs herself into a coma*
Ron: What?
Rugby fan CC Readers: I don’t get it…

‘I liked the old uniforms, THEY HAD CAPES!’

Example of what happens when the Riddikulus spell is applied to humans rather than boggarts.

Ron: Ginny?
Ginny: Yes?
Ron: If I don’t make it out alive, tell Hermione…
*Suspense builds*
Ron: …I locked Crookshanks in my closet.

Ron: Yes, Mum, I’m wearing my cup JEEZE!
Molly Weasley: It’s for your own good.
Kid with Afro: Dude, Yo Mom is a witch!
Ron: I know!

Everyone was ready for ‘Beat Ron with sticks day.’

Ron: I still don’t understand why I’m the only one who has to wear all of this bloody gear!
Harry: I told you, Ron, it’s because you’re the most sensitive!

Seconds later, the entire team was wiped out by a poorly aimed rocket that the Joker had fired at Wayne Tower.

Hermione walks by on her way to the lake during Quidditch practice…
Guys Behind Ron: DAAANG. When did Hermione get so…. so… hot?!
Ron: *Dreamily* …One year, two months and seventeen days ago….. ….approximately.

Ron: ‘Tell me, why am I the only one wearing this ridiculous armadillo costume?’

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