Week of February 15, 2009
Mrs. Weasley: Arthur, I told you something horrible would happen if you kept enchanting Muggle things!
Fred: Ouch. Poor Dad…
George: Never saw that blender coming…
Molly: ‘Those Death Eaters are ruining my garden!’
Fred: Was that a flying DeLorean that just crashed into our barn?
Molly: No, just a flying Ford Anglia.
George: Ginny was right!
Fred: Ron does have a Pygmy Puff tattoo!
Molly: Oh, I hope it’s washable!
Fred: *Thinking* Oh, great, Mom won’t be happy about this.
George: *Thinking* At least she’s attractive.
Mrs. Weasley: *Thinking* I can’t believe it! Fleur Delacour! My son is proposing to that Frenchie!
-Hermione the II
George: That new Wizard Wheezes hairspray is brilliant!
Mrs. Weasley: *From next room* AAAGGGHH MY HAIR!
Molly: ‘Oh, look! All of the gnomes are trying to kiss the angel off the top of our Christmas tree!’
Molly: Ooooh! It’s three o’clock in the morning, you would think that the Lovegoods would pick a better time to practice their Crumple-Horned Snorcack mating calls!
Fred: It’s not that bad, Mum, I think they’re beginning to tune up and harmonize a bit.
George: Yeah… I just wish they would put their robes back on.
Fred: Woah. This was not what I thought it would be.
George: I thought this was supposed to be about raising horses. I didn’t see that one coming.
Molly: We should definitely read the synopsis before going to see one of Harry’s Broadway plays.
Mrs. Weasley: What happened, Ron?
Ron: It was him, Mom, the one they speak of… the one with the long black hair, spooky eyes, and crooked nose! He was here, Mom! Michael Jackson was in my room!
–Inspired by Bartholomew’s caption last week–
Fred: *Head pops up* It comes in pints?
George: *Head pops up* It comes in pints?
Mrs. Weasley: *Head pops up* It comes in pints?!
Random Chorus: *Pop up* IT COMES IN PINTS!
*Random dance number*
Harry: …I can’t believe they changed it into a musical…
Fred: Uh, Mum, wrong movie.
That night, Mrs. Weasley realized that when he was saying ‘Avada Kedavra’, what he meant was, ‘I love you.’
James: Oliver, the emotion card says ‘astounded and a little horrified,’ not ‘old guy who wants to look cute and helpless but ends up looking really creepy.‘
Oliver: Every one’s a critic.
Mrs. Weasley: *Opens door*
Voldemort: A, B, C, D, E, F, G, I will kill your family!
Voldemort: …JK, JK!