(to the tune of “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” by Dr. Seuss.)
You’re a mean one, Voldemort.
You really are evil.
You’re as gentle as a bludger,
You’re as nice as Devil’s Snare.
You’re a bad Bertie Bott
With a gross snotty taste.
You’re so ugly, Voldemort.
You broke so many mirrors.
You have thin slits for nostrils,
And you are so very pale.
I wouldn’t touch you, with a
You’re a vile one, Voldemort
You have Doxies in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a very stupid troll.
Given the choice between you,
I’d take the very stupid troll.
You’re a loser, Voldemort.
Harry Potter beat you up.
All he got was a lightning scar,
You lost all your powers.
The three words that best describe you
Are, and I quote: Stink. Stank. Stunk.