Wizolympics 2016: Bin It to Win It Final

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Oh, shoot!! With all the excitement of the Closing Ceremony and party, I forgot to report the final score of Bin It to Win It!! Adalina Mancer, reporting from Rio de Janeiro.

Well, this certainly turned out to be an interesting game. Of course, with Ira Tater and Wizards for the Ethical Treatment of Squibs (WETS) involved, the protests didn’t stay peaceful. Chants rang out throughout the entire competition. WETS was chanting about how the Brazilian Ministry made an agreement with the Brazilian government that the Squibs will clean up the area around the venues if they allowed the wizards to host their Wizolympic Games here as well. Of course, this is only speculation. There is nothing to confirm this accusation.

When causing a scene wasn’t working, Tater proceeded to magically enchant the garbage and our competitors area to run away from them. I will admit this added an entertainment value to the Squib Games, gaining viewers for the event. With her plan backfiring, Tater and WETS were physically removed from the Wizolympic Games and took a Portkey back home. An investigation will be launched into how Tater escaped her Azkaban sentence for using an Unforgivable Curse on a judge in Sochi.

With the trash back to normal, Bin It to Win It resumed, and the competitors began to really duke it out. With the time crunch in play, we got to see the true nature of our competitors. Diggory Pitts of the United States had finally caught Alf Elfie stealing trash out of his bin. Pitts started brandishing his pokey-stick at Elfie, challenging him to a duel. After a few jabs back and forth, our judges stepped in, disqualifying both parties due to unsportsmanlike behavior.

That left Denmark, Mexico, the Philippines, and the United Kingdom still in the competition. But alas, Madden Foly of the UK seems to have passed out from the heat. We were initially worried about the Filipino contestant, Junix Jinkser, working too hard in the heat, but he was well adjusted. Foly was Portkeyed to St. Mungo’s for heat exhaustion. The MediWizards assured us that he will make a full recovery and that he is looking forward to the next Squib Games.

Well, that left only three teams, so we had our medalists. All that was left to do was count the pieces of trash in the bins. That is a job that I do not envy. With the trash all counted, it was time to announce our medalists. With 3,674 pieces of trash is Jinkser, taking home the Knut. The Sickle medal goes to the king of secrecy, Sven Spellmein of Switzerland, with 5,327 pieces of trash. Which leaves Ophelia Pancho from Mexico with the Galleon after collecting an impressive 6,911 pieces of trash. Congratulations to our medalists!! Goodbye from Rio, one last time!

 

Wizolymics logo 2016