MuggleNet reviews 'Deathly Hallows' (or not)
Happy April Fools'! We hope you enjoyed our prank this year. Judging by the comments, if it showed one thing, it's that most people will read Book 7 spoilers if they can get their hands on 'em (though, admittedly, we did make our "reviews" somewhat hard to avoid)!
Check out the joke at the link below.
Check out the joke at the link below.
Last Sunday, we received a very, very surprising call from the Harry Potter publishers. They wanted us to have a preview of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. As you can imagine, we were utterly flabbergasted. We, just like you, weren't ready to read the book, but we couldn't pass up that opportunity, now could we?
There's a catch. The publishers requested we only inform them of our thoughts on the book, and not post them online. But we really can't do that to you guys! Only a few of our staff members have so far finished it, and a little glimpse at their feelings can be read below. More will be added throughout the day. Enjoy... and shhh!
**Spoiler Alert**
"Dumbledore's triumphant resurrection, complete with the gaudy descent from the heavens on Sirius' motorbike was completely and utterly unnecessary...but at least we now know where the motorbike actually is and the significance of where it went after Book 1." -Brendan
"I couldn't believe Snape was the long lost love child of Aberforth and that goat. It explains so much, including Severus' appearance. And we now know why he told Harry to never call him a 'cow'-ard, because he was in fact part goat." -Micah
"It was great to find out what happened to Ollivander. I loved it when he walked into the Order meeting wearing a pink Hawaiian shirt, a straw hat and sunglasses and received a room full of blank stares. It was particularly funny when Lupin turned and said, 'Well, look who decided to show.'" -Andrew
"I always had an inkling that there was more to Hermione; her immediate knack with magic, and her irregular mood swings towards supposed 'friends,' Harry and Ron. I should have known she'd switch to the Dark side eventually. I just wish she hadn't killed the whole of Ravenclaw in the process - I suppose it was just her annoyance at not being sorted there initially." -Ciaran
"Funny how things turn out, who would have thought Ron would become the ninth member of The Weird Sisters. Ron with long hair and living the rock star life? Shocking!" -Rachel
"I couldn't believe Harry slipped on a slice of carrot cake and fractured his pelvis. I thought it was uncalled for humor in an otherwise serious and superb book." -Jamie
"I never thought the wizarding world would get their revenge on Snape; however, I commend JKR for proving me wrong. The Order using spells to hold Snape down and wash his hair multiple times was the worst kind of punishment imaginable for him." -Mandie
"So Dudley's worst memory when attacked by the Dementor was being told he had to diet." -Nick
"I still laugh every time I think about Draco and those geese. I guess it's not just sleeping dragons you're not suppose to tickle." -Natalie
"Who knew that J.K. Rowling would employ the use of the often-frowned-upon literary technique referred to only as 'the dog ate my homework gag,' when justifying the location of the seventh Horcrux?!" -Eric
"I was completely shocked to discover that Cedric Diggory has been alive this whole time, getting his laughs in by standing behind the veil and whispering. As for Sirius... all I can say is after a year of making that thing flow in the wind, Cedric was in need of a 'Sirius' snack!" -Laura
"The symbolic revelation that Dumbledore is actually an Animagus living in the form of a bumblebee does not do much to disprove the theory that Harry Potter is a children's book. However, after Voldemort's tragic and gruesome death caused by the shift in gravity and the moon falling down to earth, crushing him beneath it, I'm pretty sure this is a book mothers all over the world will be keeping far away from their children." -Roni
"I should have known that Luna was Harry's mother Lily in disguise. They're so similar to each other!" -Emily
"Well, we all guessed it ages ago but now it's finally confirmed - Dumbledore is the Giant Squid!" -Becky
"I knew it! I knew it! When the Muggles came and totally obliterated everyone at the final battle, I was totally ready for it. Although, I admit killing every major character in the series was going a bit overboard, especially when Neville got hit by that bus after all was said and done. I didn't know JKR had it in her!" -Tom
"Seven books, countless hours, and many tears, just to find out that Harry defeats Voldemort not with love, but a Muggle handgun?!" -Rachael
"I can't help but cry each time I think about the dramatic return of Sirius Black and how he died again only seconds after being reunited with Harry. And I never would've thought Neville would be the one to wake up at the end and realize it was all a dream. Good one, Jo!" -K'lyssa
"I think this is the first time I've ever seen corporate sponsorship of a novel. I was, quite frankly, startled by Jo's decision to make Voldemort's eight (yes, EIGHT) Horcruxes be hearts, stars, and horseshoes, clovers and blue moons, pots o' gold and rainbows, and a red balloon. Even worse were the subtleties throughout when Ron would say things like, 'This Horcrux hunt is magically delicious, Harry!' Honestly..." -Ryan
There's a catch. The publishers requested we only inform them of our thoughts on the book, and not post them online. But we really can't do that to you guys! Only a few of our staff members have so far finished it, and a little glimpse at their feelings can be read below. More will be added throughout the day. Enjoy... and shhh!
"Dumbledore's triumphant resurrection, complete with the gaudy descent from the heavens on Sirius' motorbike was completely and utterly unnecessary...but at least we now know where the motorbike actually is and the significance of where it went after Book 1." -Brendan
"I couldn't believe Snape was the long lost love child of Aberforth and that goat. It explains so much, including Severus' appearance. And we now know why he told Harry to never call him a 'cow'-ard, because he was in fact part goat." -Micah
"It was great to find out what happened to Ollivander. I loved it when he walked into the Order meeting wearing a pink Hawaiian shirt, a straw hat and sunglasses and received a room full of blank stares. It was particularly funny when Lupin turned and said, 'Well, look who decided to show.'" -Andrew
"I always had an inkling that there was more to Hermione; her immediate knack with magic, and her irregular mood swings towards supposed 'friends,' Harry and Ron. I should have known she'd switch to the Dark side eventually. I just wish she hadn't killed the whole of Ravenclaw in the process - I suppose it was just her annoyance at not being sorted there initially." -Ciaran
"Funny how things turn out, who would have thought Ron would become the ninth member of The Weird Sisters. Ron with long hair and living the rock star life? Shocking!" -Rachel
"I couldn't believe Harry slipped on a slice of carrot cake and fractured his pelvis. I thought it was uncalled for humor in an otherwise serious and superb book." -Jamie
"I never thought the wizarding world would get their revenge on Snape; however, I commend JKR for proving me wrong. The Order using spells to hold Snape down and wash his hair multiple times was the worst kind of punishment imaginable for him." -Mandie
"So Dudley's worst memory when attacked by the Dementor was being told he had to diet." -Nick
"I still laugh every time I think about Draco and those geese. I guess it's not just sleeping dragons you're not suppose to tickle." -Natalie
"Who knew that J.K. Rowling would employ the use of the often-frowned-upon literary technique referred to only as 'the dog ate my homework gag,' when justifying the location of the seventh Horcrux?!" -Eric
"I was completely shocked to discover that Cedric Diggory has been alive this whole time, getting his laughs in by standing behind the veil and whispering. As for Sirius... all I can say is after a year of making that thing flow in the wind, Cedric was in need of a 'Sirius' snack!" -Laura
"The symbolic revelation that Dumbledore is actually an Animagus living in the form of a bumblebee does not do much to disprove the theory that Harry Potter is a children's book. However, after Voldemort's tragic and gruesome death caused by the shift in gravity and the moon falling down to earth, crushing him beneath it, I'm pretty sure this is a book mothers all over the world will be keeping far away from their children." -Roni
"I should have known that Luna was Harry's mother Lily in disguise. They're so similar to each other!" -Emily
"Well, we all guessed it ages ago but now it's finally confirmed - Dumbledore is the Giant Squid!" -Becky
"I knew it! I knew it! When the Muggles came and totally obliterated everyone at the final battle, I was totally ready for it. Although, I admit killing every major character in the series was going a bit overboard, especially when Neville got hit by that bus after all was said and done. I didn't know JKR had it in her!" -Tom
"Seven books, countless hours, and many tears, just to find out that Harry defeats Voldemort not with love, but a Muggle handgun?!" -Rachael
"I can't help but cry each time I think about the dramatic return of Sirius Black and how he died again only seconds after being reunited with Harry. And I never would've thought Neville would be the one to wake up at the end and realize it was all a dream. Good one, Jo!" -K'lyssa
"I think this is the first time I've ever seen corporate sponsorship of a novel. I was, quite frankly, startled by Jo's decision to make Voldemort's eight (yes, EIGHT) Horcruxes be hearts, stars, and horseshoes, clovers and blue moons, pots o' gold and rainbows, and a red balloon. Even worse were the subtleties throughout when Ron would say things like, 'This Horcrux hunt is magically delicious, Harry!' Honestly..." -Ryan
Posted by Ciaran on Mar 31st |
1116 Comments
Visitor Comments
Hello, I did not read this until after I found out it was a joke. If I had read it I would have relized it was a joke. I love you april fools jokes. I check your page daily and I love it. Thank you for the laugh!!!!!!
haha... it wasn't that good.. Next time it needs to be more like..believable.
You guys seem to have lost it... last years and the years before was better by a mile.
last year was so much better! i was expecting something amazing!
I totally believed this and then I realized what day it was.I thought wow i'm stupid and I started laughing.nice april fool's joke. I reread it and realized how messed up some of the stuff you guys wrote was and that JKR would never write that in million years!
OMG I didnt even know it wasd April Fools day!! i totaly believed all of it all day until i read that now!! What a good April Fools Day Joke!!!!:-))
LMAO...the funniest thing i have ever seen!!!! bwahaha....did anyone actually believe it?
Good one guys, though it doesn't beat Leaky Mug, that one really was scary. Love Micah and K'lyssa's comments!
i so believed it ...fo a sec...HAhHA
wow, that last quote really made me lol:)
I was reading this yesterday, it was awesome! I think it was a fun prank, I fell for it up until you guys started writing your thoughts.... Dumbledore on Sirius's bike?! Snape part goat?! :D Those were pretty funny. The one with Hermione killing off all of Ravenclaw was good too. Anyways, I'm new to HP (scary thought, I know) and MuggleNet and MuggleCast and EVERYTHING HP, so this is the first April Fools Day joke I know from you. Good but not totally believable... very corny :D
Ha ha that was good, but I was expecting some sort of prank. I liked last years too, I fell for that one where you guys had been shut down!
I didn't read the "spoiler", but I do think that whoever came up with that prank should be declared an april fools day genious.
That soooooooooooo got me! I was so glad the article wasn't true though!
OMG! Amazing! I love it! really funny! but i have to admit that Leaky Mug was funnier! HAuahuahuaHaUhUA I just loved that! I'll never forget about Leaky Mug!
Leaky Cauldron's joke was pretty good. They didn't try to be funny or anything but it was way more believable and they probably fooled a lot of people who don't visit the site often. Their joke was that they were going to close after the 7th book is released but anyone who knows anything about the Leaky staff knows that that is definitely not going to happen (and it's not going to happen with mugglenet either!).
Great prank guy top notch
That was hilarious!!!! Even better than last year--- Congrats on a great April Fool's joke!!
ahahaahahaha! That was so freaking hilarious... *is still laughing*
I WAS SO MAD yesterday my computer was broken so I couldn't come see the joke! my friend told me about it so I wasn't fooled this time, like I normally am. HAHA last year I was so confused with the whole leaky mug thing for like 10 mins before I realized it was April 1st.... =)
That was so evil of you! I am so starved for anything Harry Potter that I believed it! I read the first one, then refused to read anymore. I spent the rest of the day banging my head against a wall, trying not to read it. At last, my will power broke, and I read the rest. I swear, I thought JK had gone insane! Bumblebees? Broken pelvises? Illegitimate goat-children?!?!? It was only when I remembered that it was Fred and George's birthdays did I realise what a cruel joke had been played on me. It didn't help that my parents thought I was crazy for freaking out so bad. THAT WAS EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You guys are soooooooooooooooooooooo cruel!!!!!! I believed it for like a minute before i realized what day it was!!!!!! Whoever came up with that idea is brilliant!!!!!!!
geez, i totally thought it was true. But honestly i was about to ask, u know, there, about snape and the goat thingy.. how about the 'eileen prince' then?
Haha, that was hilarious. How stupid of me for believing it. Oh, I'm fooled.
That is so wrong guys.
Your evil. You make Voldemort look like Oprah. (Insert metal images of Voldemort having a talk show and doing a special on bras...) Evil yessss. But funny.
haha it was fun but nothing beats last year prank... lol
OMG - good joke i totally believed you - even though about 99.9% of them where a bit far-fetched. I actually cried at the Hermione one lol !!
I realize that I'm going to sound like a total idiot but: So coool! You guys are so funny!! Like, all of you!! Ok, I'm done being silly. Now, seriously, this was great, but you can't beat the last years one.
Okay, I really didn't think or don't think this was funny... I almost decided not to read the book because it sounded like a very very bad one!!!
Are you SERIOUS?? that was really funny...when i logged on to Mugglenet on April 1st I was Waiting to see what they had this year for April's Fool, it;s funny how - even though I was LOOKING for April's Fool - I still fell for it when I read the Intro about how they got to review the book, tho by reading halfway through the first line about Dumbledore, I remembered. ------- It was all sooo funny, I love them :D
When I first read it, I believed it. I started freaking out thinking,"Why did I just read that?" Then I finally remembered it was April Fools Day. That was a great joke guys! Very very good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok this was an april fool - but was the one on mugglecast?? please sumon tell me!!
I didn't believe this for a second!....but that could be cause some1 reminded 2 min. before, that it was April Fool's Day!
Wow...you got me there. I 4got what day it was...Then yesterday i looked at it and im like "DUH!!!!" Nice one guys!
That....totally....scared me!!!! Then I realized it's april 1st. Duh! *palms forehead*
omg that had me fooled! i freaked out! but then i remembered april fools!
LOLZ!! Srsly, Ryan's comment was the best xDDD I didn't know whether to laugh or cry for K'lyssa's though... :P You guys are so mean to Snape! DD: loll, but this was great. I lolled so much :D
I feel really bad for those who fell for this. 95 was def a joke lol. very obvious. Good job at fooling every one.
omg, i totally fell for it even though i got it four days later in a mugglenet newsletter that said it was an april fool's joke. evil evil evil evil~
haha u guys r hilarious
HAHAHA this was brilliant. I read this on Sunday and I wasn't fooled, but it was entertaining to read. My favorite was the 8 Horcruxes being the 8 marshmallows from Lucky Charms! Witty. Good job guys~
Those were so funny..... THis Horcrux hunt is magically delicious! HAAAA..
lmao!!! I actually believed it - for a second or two. by the time i finished reading i was laughing like crazy!! good one guys :)
I had just gone onto another site that had a joke before so I wasn't fooled.
you guys are so mean. you got me to belive the whole thing
wow... i pretty much belived this until they posted the thing saying this wasnt real.. l did think it was a little weird and retarted, but i only read up to like the first couple because i started to stop myself cause i didnt wanna ruin the 7th book haha but yeahh.. after reading the first few i was a bit surprised because i thot that it sounded retarted and was scared that the book wasnt going to be everything i thought it would.
The first sentence got me. So I tried to scroll past, because I don't like spoilers THAT blatant, but unfortunately it wasn't written in white ink, so scrolling down you'd catch a glimpse of the "reviews". I got so pissed, and hurried past, then saw Dumbledore coming down from the sky on a motorbike...and realized it was a joke. Good one, Mugglenet, though I liked last years more.
I think I wolud have been slightly suspiscous, but it would disapear once I read the 'spoilers' I wasn't here for april fools...
I love the Lucky Charms one! #1100! Whoo!
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