Leaky Mug #7 Transcript

Thanks to TLC for all their help!


Melissa Anelli (MA): It's a LeakyMug!

Ben Schoen (BS): (singing) Hello, everybody!

John Noe (JN): Hooray for the LeakyMugs!

MA: We're back!

Sue Upton (SU): Whee!

MA: How many months has it been?

JN: The whole mug...

(breathing)

Andrew Sims(AS): What just, what just happened...

BS: It has been too long.

JN: I think it's been just long enough.

AS: Yeah.

MA: All of six months.

BS: We've got to get back in the flow.

(sound of microphone movement)

MA: Okay, whoever's...

JN: Mm-hmm.

AS: Well, it's a good thing to bring that up, Ben, because we're...

JN: What, back in the flow?

AS: ...we're going to be in the flow....

MA: Yeah, we need to start getting used to talking to each other again.

AS: ...come the summer.

JN: I know.

AS: Yeah, we don't talk often.

MA: No.

AS: We don't talk often, do we?

MA: Not ever.

JN: 'Cause we don't really like you anymore, it's really all 'cause of that.

AS: I got...

BS: Yeah.

AS: ...bored of John's jokes.

BS: The same ones over, and over...

JN: Is that it?

BS: ...and over, and over, and over.

JN: I probably prefer that just to being not funny continuously from week to week.

(AS laughs)

MA: Hmm...

BS: You implying something, John?

JN: I would never. I love your show.

(MA laughs)

AS: Oh, good.

MA: Okay, can we start this on a happy note? Hi, guys!

JN: Hi, everybody.

MA: Welcome back!

SU: Hello!

AS: Hey!

BS: Hello. Welcome to MuggleCast!

(AS and BS laughs)

MA: PotterCast. LeakyMug!

JN: Wait! Let's combine the two names!

AS: No!

SU: What...

AS: What a dumb id-.

SU: ...do we get?

AS: We get MuggleCast!

SU: No! We get LeakyMug! LeakyMug! We love the LeakyMug!

MA: (silly voice) Dawlish.

SU: (silly voice) Dawlish.

MA: Dawlish. (laughs with SU) Sorry, okay, okay. Well, anyway, we're recording for a very special reason, we have a big announcement.

BS: A big, major...

AS: Oh, can I say it, Melissa?

BS: No, I'm going to say it, actually.

MA: Well, it was Andrew's...

AS: No, I want to say it.

MA: I think Andrew, I think Andrew should.

BS: Aw.

AS: Can I say it the same way we did in rehearsals?

MA: (laughing) "The same way we did at rehearsals?"

(BS laughs)

JN: Why do you get to say it?

AS: I don't know, I can't do the joke this time, I don't think...

JN: Micah, take it away.

SU: Micah!

AS: Okay, yeah, Micah, go ahead.

BS: (imitating Micah Tannenbaum) Thanks, thanks.

MA: Oh, my God.

BS: (imitating Micah) Thanks, John. (JN and MA laugh) The announcement is that, (SU laughs) we're planning to do a live podcast in New York City.

MA: Yay!

BS: (imitating Micah) On August 2nd.

JN: Oh?

SU: Squee!

MA: Wow, we are?

BS: (imitating Micah) Andrew?

JN: Micah! I'll be darn-darned.

AS: (in an official-sounding voice) All right, thank you, Micah. Now moving on. (laughs with BS)

MA: We are, we are. It's not enough that we're doing a live LeakyMug on July 29th in Las Vegas, we're gonna come right back to New York, and on August 2nd, do another one.

BS: Yes.

MA: (laughing) Oh, God.

BS: It is going to be great.

MA: It's going to be a little bit mad.

BS: The best summer ever. Well, probably the second-best summer ever, because the next one...Ooh, it's gonna be a doozy, but...

SU: Yeah.

AS: How do you know?

JN: What's next summer going to be?

SU: Book Seven, Babe!

MA: Well, we don't know that.

JN: Where's LeakyMug going to be next year?

SU: Well, true...

MA: Where are we going next year...

AS: London.

MA: ...that's a good question.

AS: London.

MA: London or Scotland?

AS: Wherever a big event is.

MA: I don't know, there's not...

JN: How about we do it from Jo's front lawn?

(BS laughs)

MA: Sure, sure.

JN: Leakymug: "Jo Front Lawn Style."

AS: How about we discuss this before, at, like, one?

SU: Yeah.

JN: We can talk to her gardener, (AS laughs) whose name's Frank Vines, or Frank Bryce, whatever the heck his name is.

SU: Mmm.

BS: (laughing) "Frank Vines."

AS: I was going to go for Pablo, but, nevermind. So, anyway.

SU: This is exciting, we're going to New York, this is going to be great!

JN: Yes, what are we going to do there?

AS: You know...

MA: Yes, we're gonna sleep everybody in my apartment.

JN: I know, really...

AS: You know what's really inspiring me?

JN: ...we're going to take some naps.

AS: You know what's really inspiring me this time around?

MA: What?

AS: The fact that we are already getting emails from people asking us to go and do a podcast in New York.

MA: Yeah.

SU: Mm-hmm.

AS: All ready, it's been, like, three days or four days since we got the official announcement.

MA: And they're saying...

BS: (in a British accent) And we love your support.

MA: "Aren't you guys going to be there?" And yes, we've managed to secure a ton of tickets, all our staffs are going to be there...

Everyone: Woo!

MA: ...And we're all in New York, and so Andrew emailed me and said, "You know what we should do?" and I said that, "I know...I know, what we should do." And we emailed Barnes and Noble and they said, "Actually, we were about to contact you!" (laughs) So, they said, "Yes, let's do this." So, they're looking into venues, they're trying to make sure that the one that we were at in November, which is the Union Square Barnes and Noble on 17th Street, it's the flagship store, it's huge! They want that one, but they're fixing the escalator, they might be...

SU: Yay! Finally.

MA: (laughing)...so, we might not be able to get that because they're doing that. Anyway, they're looking for a venue and we'll update you when we have more information about where it will be. If they don't get that venue, they have assured us that they will figure something out. So...

BS: Cool.

MA: Yeah.

JN: I wish they would...

BS: We should, they should put us in Times Square.

JN: Exactly!

MA: (sarcastically) Sure. Is there a Barnes and Noble in Times Square?

BS: I think we should do it right in the middle of the street.

AS: There's a Toys-R-Us.

SU: (scoffing) Oh, yeah!

JN: Outside!

JN: Do Toys-R-Us, do Toys-R-Us!

BS: Well, we can't...

AS: I can't wait for Dick Clark to come out.

SU: Yeah, they have him dropped out of PotterCast, like, mug or something, like in a little thing...

MA: Oh, leave Dick alone...

JN: They have to unfreeze him from the (BS laughs) cryogenic-thing...

BS: (laughing) Dig him out of the grave...

MA: Stop, stop...

AS: (laughing) No...

MA: He's not dead.

AS: (laughing)...he is not dead!

JN: No...

AS: (recovering from laugh) That's terrible.

JN: ...he's a sweetheart.

BS: Yeah, he's a good guy, I love Dick Clark.

JN: Yup.

MA: No, you need the Naked Cowboy, that's what you're gonna need.

JN: The Naked Cowboy can be a guest.

MA: Have you guys ever seen the Naked Cowboy?

AS: No, but...

BS: No, we have not, but...

AS: When me and you were in the taxi going through Times Square, you were like, "Hey, look out for the Naked Cowboy!"

MA: Yeah, it's hilarious.

JN: No, no, no, I...

AS: I'm like, "Yeah, I'll look for him..."

MA: Well, I don't love him, but he's always there in his briefs, no matter what the weather, and he still has a guitar. It's hilarious.

AS: He has a guitar, too?

JN: I think you guys need to respect the other sites a little more than to refer to them as "the Naked Cowboy."

BS: Okay, Andrew, so besides, besides the Naked Cowboy, what most are you looking forward to about New York City?

AS: (laughs) The second Naked Cowboy.

(BS laughs)

JN: Is he training, like, a replacement?

AS: No, really wrong, really wrong, what I just said.

JN: You love the Naked Cowboy.

AS: What else am I looking forward to? I'm really looking forward to being able to sort of have the same experience that we did in the Goblet of Fire premiere. Having everyone out on the red carpet, all the fans out on the red carpet lining the streets...just the excitement. There was so much excitement at the Goblet of Fire premiere.

MA: This is going to be bigger.

BS: Much bigger.

JN: Now, explain, I wonder how this is going to work with us, though, because we kind of covered it, the red carpet, last time.

MA: Well, we gotta cover it; this time, too, we are reporters.

JN: And then we walk down it to go into the thing.

AS: Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You think, you think they're going to do that kind of thing?

JN: 'Cause not every one of the six thousand people while walking into that theater is going to go down the red carpet.

MA: No, they, they have side entrances you can...we're not going to go down the red carpet.

BS: Right.

MA: There may not even be a red carpet, though I can't imagine they're not going to have Jo walk by press, you know?

AS: Mm-hmm. Well, it could be an indoor press thing.

JN: They could do the press inside. Yeah, I don't...

MA: No, they don't do the press inside because it's...

JN: They'd have to acknowledge everyone outside at some...

MA: It's not even "acknowledge." It's a bigger...they, the publicity people want a bigger splash. You want to have it outside.

SU: Right.

MA: You want it to look like pandemonium.

BS: And especially since she hasn't been in the States for six years.

MA: Mm-hmm.

SU: Right.

BS: And so they, they're going to have her show her face or else it wouldn't...

JN: Do you think celebrities would show up?

SU: Yeah.

MA: Yes!

SU: I do.

JN: Under what circumstances, sit there and listen to her read?

MA: To say that they went to this amazing event.

JN: Yeah.

BS: If, Stephen King, Stephen King's going to be there, too.

MA: I mean, my God, Stephen King.

JN: I mean, I see it being huge for...

SU: And John Irving; they're both enormous, popular writers, I mean...

BS: Stephen King is....

JN: Oh, I understand, I understand the draw, but I just see that as more of a draw for fans of them versus, like, celebrities.

MA: Well....

AS: It's the same reason that celebrities go to...

MA: The premiere.

AS: Right. Yeah.

MA: Celebrities are people, too. They want to see these things.

SU: Yeah.

AS: Mm-hmm.

JN: Yeah, but, I mean, they go to other premieres because: a) they are going to see a movie, and b) it's in the same industry.

SU: Well...

JN: People are celebrities for, like, unless we get other authors....

MA: Well, I'm sure we'll get other authors, but...

JN: That would make sense.

MA: ...enough people are fans of J.K. Rowling that I think this and celebrities...

AS: Well, yeah, one reason...

JN: I mean, I got a call from Emma to see if I was going with anybody...

SU: No, but...

AS: Ah, that's hilarious!

SU: (JN and AS laugh) But don't forget that this is also a charity event for, this is also a charity event for the Doctors Without Borders and the Haven Foundation.

MA: Yes.

SU: And, you know, so, that's a pretty big thing, so...

BS: I don't know, am I the only one, Melissa, you like Stephen King, don't you?

MA: Yeah, absolutely.

BS: I know, I love him, so I'm pretty excited.

MA: Yeah.

BS: He's going to attract a lot of people, too, because...

SU: Yeah.

MA: He has also...

BS: ...next to Jo, next to Jo, he's right up there. (laughs)

SU: Mm-hmm.

MA: Yeah, he was probably the best-selling author until she came around, (laughs) and blew everybody out of the...I mean, I don't know, I don't know book ratings and stuff probably as well as I should, but...

JN: Well that, and then Dr. Seuss.

MA: Well, yeah...

SU: Dr. Suess! (laughs)

MA: But you know what I mean.

JN: Come on, represent.

MA: Oh, stop. So, no, Stephen King is huge. (BS laughs) He's been a giant for so long, and he's been a huge supporter of Jo's.

SU: Mm-hmm.

MA: He has said some really great things. (laughs)

BS: But, isn't it, it's going to be legendary to have them on the same stage.

MA: Oh, yeah, and John Irving, my God!

SU: Yeah!

JN: Do you think they're going to act out the passages together, or are they each going to perform their own book? (AS and BS laugh)

MA: That'd be really funny. (SU laughs)

JN: 'Cause I would love to see Stephen King's Mad-Eye Moody.

(MA and BS laugh)

AS: Well, it is going to get pretty interactive, here. We're going to have questions from the audience...

MA: Mm-hmm. If you bought a ticket, you can ask a question.

JN: "What's the title of Book Seven?"

(AS and BS laugh).

MA: (laughs) They are going to ask that question, you know that's going to happen.

JN: She's just gonna be like, "Oh, hum-da-dee-dee-dee..."

SU: Yeah.

AS: She'll roll her eyes and get that person outta there.

JN: She'll be like "Oh, you guys, stop!" (SU laughs) "I'm not going to answer anything important here." (AS laughs)

MA: Yes, she will...

AS: "Check my official site."

MA: ...she's more fair than that.

JN: I know, she's awesome.

BS: Yeah.

JN: I have a crush on her.

MA: So does...

BS: Whatever, Dude...

MA: I heard it's reciprocated, John, even though she dealt you a big smackdown this week.

BS: Oh...

JN: (laughs) See...

MA: Smack down!

JN: ...she's just teasing, that's how we tease.

MA: Down! (makes a booming sound) (BS laughs)

AS: That's how you guys mess with each other?

JN: Yes - no.

MA: You bash each other on the websites?

JN: We're very public about our flirting.

BS: Yeah. Just keep digging yourself deeper in the hole.

MA: Man, she laid it out cold for you, too; she's like, "No, it is not 'horcri,' sorry."

BS: Yeah.

JN: Aw, that's okay. You know, you just wait, next month it's gonna be in the toxic bin that we're not dating.

BS: (laughs) Yeah.

MA: Okay.

BS: I bet.

MA: Okay. Anyway, our live podcast, guys. August 2nd, during the day, not at night.

JN: Okay.

MA: That way we all - that way that if you're going to the show, you have plenty of time to get over there and also, we wanna have more time to, you know, to hang out.

JN: Yeah.

AS: And this is gonna be a fun one. Like, the Lumos one we're gonna do some book discussion I - I guess, right?

MA: I hope. (laughs)

SU: We hope, yeah.

AS: Yeah, we're gonna do some of that. But like this, this Leaky Mug on August 2nd is gonna be more, like, fun. We're gonna talk about some good times at Lumos, and what we saw at the first reading.

SU: Mm-hmm.

AS: So...

MA: And we'll talk with some of you who went to the first reading...

JN: Yeah.

AS: Yes.

MA: ...and you know, have some interaction, and just enjoy it.

AS: Yeah.

JN: Now which chapter of Book Seven is she gonna read from?

MA: Stop that! (everyone laughs)

AS: Oh! Actually I know which one. We know. It's actually the one that she was typing up because (JN laughs) Mugglenet's Andy...

JN: "Mugglenet Greg?"

AS: No no, this is "Mugglenet Andy." We've got...

JN: Oh.

AS: ...a brand-new character in the mix here.

SU: Mmm.

JN: Andy...

AS: It's time to retire Mugglenet Greg...

JN: Oh!

AS: ...Bring on Mugglenet Andy! (laughs)

JN: No! He's the best! I'm telling him. Mugglenet Greg: you heard that! The job (BS laughs) has been offered to you at Leaky.

BS: Yeah. (laughs)

JN: If you wanna work.

AS: Come on! Mugglenet Andy's all the rage now. (laughs)

BS: Yeah, dude.

AS: But. anyway...

JN: I'm gonna buy a shirt that says "Mugglenet Andy." (AS laughs)

MA: Oh, no! He's gonna start showing up in chat rooms.

BS: Oh, great!

JN: I don't like that name very much. It's not as fun as Greg.

BS: Probably just registering his screen name right now. (AS laughs)

JN: Yeah. No, you know I'm gonna register MugglenetAndyfans.ws. (BS laughs) That's what I'm gonna do.

BS: Hey! You wanna be a network site? (everyone laughs)

JN: Of course it would be. (laughing) You could use a few more.

MA: So, guys...

AS: Coming soon!

MA: ...you guys are gonna be back in my hometown. Jo is coming to my hometown! This is, like, huge!

BS: Actually...

SU: That's awesome!

BS: Yeah you and - you and ten million other people's hometown. (laughs)

MA: Well, but it's my hometown. (everyone laughs)

JN: Yeah.

MA: I am the biggest Harry Potter fan in this town!

BS: Oh, whatever...

MA: In this town!

BS: ...Micah Tannenbaum is the biggest Harry Potter fan...

MA: (SU laughs) Yeah, not so much.

AS: Yeah. What I wanna do, at the live podcast, first thing I wanna yell, not - no "Yeah, yeah, all right," this year the new catchphrase is, "Jo is in the house!" (laughs)

SU: Oh, man.

BS: Don't you even.

MA: Don't start with that!

BS: Don't you even!

MA: Oh my God, that's like the worst thing...

JN: Dude, what are you...

MA: ...I've ever heard.

JN: ...what are you trying to do to me? (MA and JN laugh)

AS: Okay, "Jo is in the city." (JN laughs) Jo is in the city.

MA: Okay, no!

AS: (singing) In the city! Hey, Ben, we need to make up a new "City of Blinding Lights..."

SU: Oooh.

AS: ...JK Rowling revision.

BS: Yeah! Oh yeah, Dude, we have to.

AS: (singing) Six years...

JN: You guys...

AS: ...too late. (laughs) Something, I don't know.

MA: Well, dude I wanna show her...

JN: ...wait till you see...

MA: ...I wanna show her all the coffee hangouts and the best shoe stores...

SU: Mm-hmm.

MA: Hanging out.

SU: Let's go shopping, let's do it.

JN: Wait till you guys see the commemorative edition "Jo in New York City" T-shirts, to be released soon. (BS laughs)

SU: Oh, really?

JN: All proceeds going to charity.

AS: The John Noe College Foundation.

JN: No, no, no, no, no.

MA: No. (BS laughs)

JN: Doctors Without Borders and all the other things from the Hans Zell Foundation.

BS: Are you serious? Are there some...

MA: Yeah.

BS: ...real T-shirts being made?

MA: Yeah we're gonna make some that...

JN: Yeah.

MA: ...and, and donate the procees to the charities for which...

JN: They are slick! Yeah, we're doing it together, guys. You remember this. (SU laughs)

AS: What!?

SU: Surprise! (laughs)

AS: Oh we are? All right, I'll remember that. (laughs)

JN: Yeah, I showed you the things last week.

AS: No! (laughs) You're so weird!

BS: You're such a clown, John.

JN: A.K.A.: I'm emailing them to you at the moment. (MA laughs)

AS: Oh, okay. (laughs)

SU: There you go.

MA: Check you email, wink wink. (AS and BS laugh) Guys, we're gonna have...

AS: Are we, seriously?

MA: ...no seriously, guys...

AS: Oh, okay.

MA: ... we're coming together for a good cause as we do. When there are good causes to be had.

BS: First it was Potter Fans for Katrina.

MA: Mm-hmm.

BS: Then it was...

MA: Doctors Without Borders.

BS: Yeah. Mm-hmm.

JN: And then Book Aid.

MA: So...

BS: (laughing) "Book Eight?"

MA: Book Aid!

AS: BookAid.

SU: That's who we...

BS: Oh are they? I thought John was pulling a - thought John was trying to be funny.

MA: No, that's who we raised for in the summer...

BS: "Book Eight..."

MA: ...In - in the...

SU: In the winter.

MA: ...in the winter for our Get a Clue.

SU: Yeah!

MA: Woo, my brain... Guys, we have, like, this crazy, crazy...week. I mean, what is it gonna be, like, fourteen days that we're together?

JN: It's gonna be crazy!

BS: It's gonna be nuts!

AS: Drive into a ditch!

MA: Thanks, guys. (AS laughs)

JN: (laughing) Drive into a ditch!? You're terrible!

MA: Jesus!

AS: When I, when I hear a certain song, I mean.

MA: What song?

BS: Andrew, so what are we going to do? Are we just gonna get back to your house...

AS: (singing) "Cause you had a bad day..." (BS laughs) Urrgh!

SU: (singing) "Bad day!"

AS: Urgh!

MA: Oh stop that song! (SU still singing softly) American Idol has destroyed that song.

AS: Oh my God! Melissa, my mom said the same exact thing, earlier today...

MA: Oh my gosh, they don't stop playing it!

AS: ...We heard it on the radio, and she was like, "American Idol killed this song..." (MA makes exasperated sigh) Well, she didn't say it in that tone ... That's funny.

MA: That's right everybody, I am Andrew's mother!

JN: (JN gasps in shock) I hear that...

BS: Do they just play it when they throw somebody off?

MA: Yeah, whenever they - every week when they throw somebody off, it's like, "Gee, what song are we gonna play now?" (BS laughs) (mimicking while singing) "You had a bad day! Yeah!" Anyways, this is not IdolCast.

(BS laughing)

JN: Is that what they do? I've never watched that show.

BS: (laughing) Yeah.

AS: Yeah.

MA: Yeah, that is what they do every time.

JN: That's so funny!

MA: It's like, "Haha, you had a bad day!"

BS: (laughing) Yeah.

MA: "Let's give you the finger as we kick you out the door."

JN: Funny.

MA: And it's supposed to be all sweet and sentimental, but it's really mean.

BS: (laughing) Yeah.

JN: I thought you meant they made them sing that song before they left.

MA: No.

BS: No, but seriously - Oh, that would suck - Hey, Andrew, Andrew...

JN: "Okay, it's your turn..."

BS: Andrew, okay, so we're flying - you and I we're flying together. On the way back, we're going to what, get into Philadelphia and then turn around and take a train to New York City, or what?

MA: Yeah...

AS: Uh ... no, we got a good, like, twelve hours downtime. (MA laughs) Including - we'll sleep and eat Doritos.

BS: (laughing) Huh, twelve hours...

JN: It's like a whole adventure, you guys should document it.

AS: Oh - oh, yeah. (laughs)

BS: Andrew, we should...

SU: Yeah, like Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure; (MA laughs) we have "Ben and Andrew's Excellent Adventure."

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