CC #390: Week of June 29, 2014

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Ron: So… do you know Parseltongue?
Hermione: Why would I know Parseltongue?
Ron: Okay, this plan wasn’t very well thought-out.

Ron: This is it, Hermione, the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets!
Hermione: Looks more like the home of Bilbo Baggins’s evil twin…
Ron: I didn’t know Bilbo Baggins had an evil twin!
Hermione: He doesn’t…I just meant –
Ron: Oh I get it, you mean like the personification of the part of Bilbo’s psyche that’s corrupted by the Ring, which becomes a part of himself that is not himself, a metaphorical Evil Twin?
Hermione: …
Ron: I totally should have studied Literature
Hermione: Well let’s concentrate on saving the world first
Ron: Cool

Hermione: Ron, when I said that the door to the Chamber of Secrets was fascinating, that didn’t mean I wanted you to put it at the entrance to our cellar.
Ron: But it looks perfect here!

Hermione: ‘Honestly, Ron, when you said you wanted to show me how good you were at Parseltongue, I thought you meant some kind of kissing.’

Hermione: ‘You did it, Ron. All right now let’s go in. *The door opens. There is a putrid smell.* Did no one bother to clean up the dead Basilisk?’

Hermione: Oh no, I dropped some of my candy in there!
Ron: I guess, ‘her Skittles will lie in the Chamber forever.’

‘I feel like if we stare at it long enough, it’ll do some crazy snake thing and open.’

Hermione: Before we go in there, I want to say I love you, Ron.
Ron: Aw thanks. *He walks into the chamber. Hermione shuts him in.*

Ron: ‘Mmmm Hermione, your sssssshampoo sssssmellssss sssssoo good. Sssshould we ssssneak through this ssssnake door now?’
-Maddy E.

Hermione: To open the door, say ‘open sesame.’
Ron: Open Sesame….. Seed bun with two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions.
*Hermione face palms*

Ron: ‘Banksy’s gone too far with this one.’

Hermione: Snakes. Why’d it have to be snakes?
Ron: Asps… very dangerous. You go first.





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Eric S.

Eric Scull joined MuggleNet in November of 2002. Since that time, he’s presided over a number of sections, including name origins and Dear Hogwarts, but none so long as the recently revived Crazy Caption Contest. Eric is a Hufflepuff who lives in Chicago and loves the outdoors.