CC #246: Week of December 27, 2007
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Fred: Okay… *Throws fishing line down* …I caught something!
Ginny: What?
George: Nevermind, it’s just a dusty glass sphere from the Department of Mysteries. *Sigh* Nothing that anyone would ever want…
–The Required Name
Hermione: *Thinking* If only Ron would look at me like that for once!
-NorwayNina
Harry: ‘Oh, good, that’ll come in handy when you lose your real ear in Book 7! Excellent, George, always thinking ahead!’
-AMG
Hermione: *Whispers* Harry, don’t look up like that.
Harry: Why not?
Hermione: People can see stubble, and you look too old to be 15.
Harry: Yeah… like that’s the only thing that makes me look older. What about my height?
Everyone (except Harry): *Crack up*
-Betsy
‘Oh, look, a plot hole…’
-Viewer
Moody: *Looking up from below* Nice stubble, Potter.
Harry: Thanx.
Ron: *Coughs and rubs chin*
Moody: What’s your problem, Weasley?
Ron: It’s just, you didn’t comment on my stubble.
Ginny: Can’t comment on what’s not there.
-Betsy
Fred: Look, it’s MuggleNet’s happy holidays video!
George: Fascinating… Ginny, look at this!
Ginny: *Looks*
Harry: All right – Ron, Hermione, – while they’re distracted, I wanted to talk with you about this Horcrux-hunting expedition we’re going on…
-S_B
*Order members exit the building*
Fred: Bet I can hit Snape with this baseball.
George: 3 Sickles you can’t.
*Pause*
Snape: *Screams*
Fred: Cough up!
Hermione: YOU HIT A TEACHER!
Snape: Nine billion points from Gryffindor!
-Pigwidgeon
George: Hey, look, Remus and Tonks are kissing.
Others: *Look*
Ron: Wait, Lupin’s a werewolf. He can’t have a girlfriend!
Hermione: *Glaring* Don’t be so thickheaded, Ronald. You’re an idiot and yet we end up together…
-Kawi
Ron: Harry, wanna buy a duck?
Harry: A what?
Ron: A duck!
Harry: Does it quack?
Ron: Of course it quacks, it’s a duck!
Harry: Hermione, wanna buy a duck?
Hermione: A what?
Harry: A what?
Ron: A duck!
Harry: A duck!
Hermione: Does it quack?
Harry: Does it quack?
Ron: Of course it quacks, it’s a duck!
Harry: Of course it quacks, it’s a duck!
Hermione: Hey, George! Wanna buy a duck…
-Potter! at the Disco
Voldemort: *Off-screen* Knock, knock.
Harry: Who’s there?
Voldemort: You know.
Harry: You know who?
Voldemort: Yes. Avada Kedavra!
-Gigi
The gang watches as Voldemort strolls in the door of Number 12, Grimmauld Place.
Arthur: *In hushed tones* Voldy, what’re you doing here?
Voldemort: I thought Molly invited me for tea.
Arthur: Yes, but after the kids go to school.
Voldemort: You mean you ahven’t told them that all is well and we’ve made up?
Arthur: NO! Shhh… now leave!
Harry, Hermione, Fred, George, Ginny, Ron: …..
-HedwigIsMyBuddy
Harry: So… whose ear is that?
Fred: I don’t know. We found it at Wendy’s in San Jose.
-Sam
Fred: *Reaches down with a pair of tweezers* I did it! I got the ear!
Harry: It’s my turn! *Reaches down with tweezers*
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!
Harry: Darn! I hit the side…
Ginny: You guys, this is so lame. Whose idea was it to make a life-size game of Operation anyways?
-Phylliss
Harry: Okay, let’s sing it!
Everyone: *Takes a deep breath*
Ron: Row,
George: Row,
Ginny: Row,
Fred: Your
Hermione: Boat,
Harry: Gently
Ron: Down
George: The
Ginny: Stream…
Fred: Merrily,
Hermione: Merrily,
Harry: Merrily,
Ron: Merrily,
George: Life
Ginny: Is
Fred: Such
Hermione: A
Harry: …BORE!
*Awkward silence as everyone looks at Harry*
Harry: What? It IS!!!
-tOnKy WoNkY
And the gang gathers to determine the exact percentage discount they will demand from the theme park cafe…
-I. Afridi
This week on Inside People’s Noses…
-PremzaKPPhawke
Harry: What do you think it is?
Ron: IDK.
Hermione: *Annoyed* Ron, I thought you were gonna stop speaking IM talk.
Ron: You guys are losers, TTYL.
-Horsegirl
Fred: Harry, did Snape really love your mum?
Harry: Yeah.
George: I wonder why?
Ginny: Probably because they were best friends. Don’t most people end up in love with their best friends of the other gender?
Harry: No.
Ron: Yes. No! I mean no! No, they don’t!
Hermione: …
-Lily Snape
Harry: Making the first incision…
Everyone: Oooooooohhhh….
Hermione: Watch it, Harry – you don’t need to go past the appendicular artery.
Harry: George! The pancreas is not a toy!
-Sadie
Everyone stares suspiciously as Harry’s bottle lands once again pointing to Ginny…
-emiB
Harry: Did she just say what I think she said?
Ron: Calm down, Harry. You knew it would happen eventually.
Hermione: What did you expect? There aren’t going to be anymore books after Deathly Hallows.
Harry: But how can I be replaced by a book called the ‘Spiderwick Chronicles‘?
Ginny: Easily. It’s an uncomplicated plot with characters you can relate to.
Harry: People can relate to me!
Ron: You’ve got a lightning scar on your forehead, mate.
Harry: I’m sure plenty of people have those…
-ILovePancakes
George: ‘For some reason, I have a bad feeling about using my ear to listen at the door below… It feels like an ‘ear death experience…’
-Dania
Daniel: Emma, I saw Ballet Shoes.
Emma: Oh! *smiles* Did you like it?
Daniel: Actually, it was crap…
Everyone Else: Fight! Fight! Fight!
-Tania
Dan: Ugh, I hate all this stupid new ‘CGI’ stuff. You can never tell which tennis ball they want you to look at.
Others: *Mumble in agreement*
Emma: There’s only one…
-Ellle
Fred: A little more to the left… Steady, Georgie.
Ginny: Is this really worth it?
Hermione: Of course it is! There is no other way to get our hands on Hannah Montana tickets than by snatching them from a little girl!
Ron: Yeah… totally worth it.
-Lily
Hermione: Albus Severus, Harry? Are you sure?
Harry: I think he’d have appreciated the gesture.
Everyone: …
Ginny: Yeah, we’re thinking of calling the next one Marvolo Draco.
-Jenny
‘It’s chaos theory and demonstration of gravity at the same time! It’ll be awesome!’
-Stevie and Carson
Fred: *SCHH* This is Dogfighter 1 to Dogfighter 2. Do you read me, Dogfighter 2? Over. *SCHH*
Dogfighter 2: *SCHH* Meow. *SCHH*
Group: …
-SlytherinGirl891 and PotterPalFreak
Harry: Hey, guys, I know you’re all miserable, but d’you know what would make this situation great?
Ron: What?
Harry: ORANGE MOCHA FRAPPACINOS!
-Mel
Fred: Big Red to Night Crawler.
Kreacher: Night Crawler here.
Fred: Fall back, fall back! Mother Hen is on the move, get yourself outta there!
Kreacher: Oh no! She’s coming, I – *static*
Fred: Night Crawler! Night crawler! …We lost him…
Harry: Wait, who’s Night Crawler? And what happened to Soaring Eagle?!
-Nazko
Emma: Hey… Dan?
Dan: Yeah?
Emma: You, um… you missed a spot.
Dan: Oh. Thanks, I’ll get it later.
Rupert: And… um… Dan?
Dan: Yeah?
Rupert: Um… I hope you know this is coming from a friend. But you… you are the first person I have ever seen with blue chin stubble that wasn’t on the Flintstones.
Dan: …
Bonnie: Just go ahead and shave again, Dan. I know you did it this morning, but you’re supposed to be playing a fifteen-year-old. It’s enough that you have neck muscles.
Oliver: But hey, on the bright side, Jo mentions that you have a ‘dark shadow’ on your face in Deathly Hallows, so maybe you can get a little artsy with the facial hair then!
-Kaatje
