Week of March 16, 2003
Harry: Now, Hagrid, I’m warning you, Muggle children will react very.. peculiar when they see you.
Hagrid: You mean run away? Yeah, I get that alot…
Harry: Er.. no.. not quite… see Muggle children believe in a.. different sort of magic…
Hagrid: Whatever it is, I’m sure I’ve heard it before. People say a lot of mean things ter me all the time…
Harry: Ok, just don’t be surprised if they sit on your lap and ask for a Betsy Wetsy Doll…
Harry: Hagrid, you’re sitting on something again…
Hagrid: I thought the seat felt uncomfortable…
Harry: Bloody hell! You’ve sat on Sean! Now he can’t be in PoA!
Hagrid: Er.. sorry about that, Mr. Biggerstaff, better luck next time, eh?
Sean: You’ll pay for this, Kloves! You’ll PAY FOR THIS!!!!
Harry: *whispering* Hagrid, I forgot my lines!
Hagrid: Ah, don’t worry, Harry, this is going to end up as a deleted scene and half of the people who get the Dvd won’t be able to find them, so the world will never know!
Harry: *wolf whistle* Nice legs!
Hagrid: Why thank you, Harry!!!
Harry: *running up and down the center*
Hagrid: ‘Arry! Sit down and read a book!
Harry: But I don’t wanna! Waaah!
Hagrid: *sigh* Evil-Curse Survivors…
Hagrid: Harry, look at the legs on that woman!
Hagrid: Look, I think she likes me!
Harry: Uh, Hagrid, I believe she was doing that to Dumbledore…
Harry: I know this is the wizarding world and things here work differently.. but who knocked you up?
Harry: Hey, Hagrid?
Harry: Why is there a picture here with you in a pink nightgown and fuzzy bunny slippers?
Hagrid: What?! Oh, sorry, I er.. gave you the wrong album, could I have it back now please?
Harry: Are you kidding? I’m going to post it all over school!
Harry: …Wow! Naked Girls!
Hagrid: Oops, wrong magazine!
Harry: Hagrid, this is yours!
Hagrid: It was Fang, he set me up!
Chris: Now, Robbie, what did I tell you about bringing ‘special’ magazines on set?
Hagrid: Riiight, ‘save them for breaks’… I’m sorry..
Harry: Why are we on this train, Hagrid?
Hagrid: It’s part o’ the storyline.
Harry: I know, but Chris took this scene out of the movie!
Chris: Anyway.. How did you get this, Eric?
Eric: Umm.. *looks confused* ..internet!
Eric: Okay, okay, I got it from Dobby!
Dan: Hey, Chris, I think you’ve got the wrong scripts here! It says that I say goodbye to my three children, and then… WHAT!? Dress like a woman!?!?
Chris: Ohhhh, right, sorry, that’s Daniel Hillard, you know, Mrs. Doubtfire? I’m sure you know all about that movie of course.
Dan: Sorry, no..
Chris: Blimey, Danny! Haven’t you wondered where Robin Williams learned it all?
Dan: Learned what?
Chris: He’s an actor, Danny.
Dan: No, there must be a mistake… He’s Robin Williams.. just Robin Williams…
Harry: Say, Hagrid?
Harry: Did you see last week’s Caption Contest?
Hagrid: No, why?
Harry: That Emerson guy’s really got me annoyed…
Harry: Yeah, he’s got me selling Girl-Scout cookies!
Harry: How come this scene isn’t going to be in the movie, Hagrid?
Hagrid: Because we look like bums…
Harry: What’s a bum?
Hagrid: Bums are people kind of like me…
Harry: Ok… so bums are gigantic, emotional, hairy guys that show up in the middle of the night and take you away to a magical place where you get lots of money and magic stuff?
Hagrid: So, Harry, all set for Hogwarts?
Harry: Yep! Say… why are you crying, Hagrid?
Hagrid: Oh, *sniff* It’s just… *sniff* it was only yesterday *sniff* You were so small…
Harry: But I’m small to you every day, Hagrid!
Harry: Er, Hagrid? This looks strangely like the set for Men In Black II when the big ugly monster comes and destroys all the…
Hagrid: Aww, look at ‘em, He’s so cuute! Awwww! What was that you were saying, Harry?
Harry: I can’t believe it!
Hagrid: We got on the wrong train!
Harry: It’s times like these I wish I had Dumbledore’s left knee!
Harry: OK, Hagrid, let’s memorize lines!
Harry: Let’s see… ‘my prreeeccciiouuusss‘
Hagrid: That’s Dobby‘s line!
Harry: Oh, sorry…
Harry: Is that… Professor McGonagall?!?
Hagrid: Erm.. no.. well.. uh… I wasn’t supposed ter put that one in the photo book!
Hagrid: ‘Ow about a singsong, Harry? Ohhhh!!!! The wheels on the Hogwarts Express go round and round!
Harry: Somebody please shoot me…
Harry: It says here ‘All students must be equipped with a pair of dragon-hide gloves, a wand, and a’ … ‘a rubber chicken’?!?
Hagrid: Well what else are yeh supposed ter defend yerself wit after the wand warranty expires?
Harry: Is this really my school supply list? All it says is milk and cookies…
Hagrid: Oh, sorry, that’s meh grocery list…
-Ivana and Erica
Harry: Hey, Hagrid, did you know the US is at war with Iraq? Hey.. wait a minute.. you somewhat look like this Saddam guy…
Hagrid: No Comment…
Harry: *reading* ‘Dear Hermione: Roses are red, Violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and um… I love you.. -Ron’ !!!!
Hagrid: Quick, put it back, he’s coming!
Harry: …Notebook paper (college ruled), two sets of #2 pencils, colored pencils, five-subject notebook.. what type of list is this?!?
Hagrid: Muggle School Supply List! Made it myself!
Harry: But aren’t I going to Hogwarts?
Hagrid: …Right, sorry…
Harry: Hagrid? Why does my letter say ‘We can meet near the Whomping Willow at 7:00, and maybe I’ll give you a Minerva’s Kiss‘?!?
Hagrid: Oops, Harry! That is my letter, this is yours!
Hagrid: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix is officially scheduled to release on June 21st, 2003.
Harry: Let me see that. Yes, I can FINALLY get back in action!
Harry: Wow, Hagrid, your feet are huge!
Harry: Oh, I’m sorry, pleasantly plump…
Hagrid: That’s better!
Harry: Really, Hagrid, I know you think your dental hygienist is pretty, but did you really have to eat a whole box of Oreo’s while we were waiting?
Hagrid: Harry, you seem rather upset that you’re reading Book Five, why?
Harry: It says.. that you.. you die! You get on Madam Maxime’s bad side!
‘Look, Hagrid, they’ve found out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie-pop!’
Hagrid: What does it say, Harry?
Harry: I can’t tell, the picture’s too blurry… It doesn’t matter though, they’re going to delete this scene from the movie anyway.
Harry: Have anything yet, Hagrid?
Hagrid: No… Just a goldfish..
Harry: But this is how the book said JK came up with me!
Hagrid: Wait, wait, I’m getting something..
Harry: What, what is it?!?
Hagrid: A blue locomotive named Thomas!
Not going anywhere for a while? Grab a Snickers.