Week of December 20, 2009
Slughorn: Harry! What did I say to you?!
Harry: Erm – not to, er…
Slughorn: Not to bother me when I’m doing strange things with my hands! Now leave, before I take away points for disturbing a teacher!
Harry: Have you found a new beetle, sir?
Slughorn: Why, yes, Harry. I believe I’ll call it a… Volkswagen.
-Leanna E. and Family
Harry: Uh, Professor? We’ll need more plants if we want to rip off Avatar. Also, we’ll need blue people.
Slughorn: Don’t worry about that, Harry, I locked the Hufflepuffs outside overnight.
…and Harry, slowly putting his hand on the open window, pushed.
Inspired by the ‘Yu-Gi-Oh GX: Abridged Series’ by DarkSideInc.
Professor Slughorn and Harry: ‘REACTION SHOT!!’
Harry: Aren’t tentacula leaves very valuable?
Slughorn: Oh, yes. 10 Galleons a leaf to the right buyer. Though, still not nearly as valuable as expired gorilla milk…
Inspired by Ian’s caption last week:
101 Things Not to Do on a First Date #67 – scrape mold off of the greenhouse windows.
Harry: Sir, what are you doing in Jamie Waylett’s garden? Aren’t those leaves extremely valuable?
Slughorn: 10 Galleons a bag to the right customer!
Harry: Cut the green wire!
Slughorn: …It’s a plant! They’re all green!
Harry: *Cheerily, after taking Felix Felicis* Professor?
Slughorn: *Tired* Yes, Harry?
Harry: You know that ‘Happy Potion’ you gave me?
Harry: Well, I took it!
Harry: *Suddenly sad* I feel sick…
Harry: How are the petunias coming along?
Slughorn: Nicely. Nicely.
Harry: Good to hear. I had some trouble with my hydrangeas, but I’ve sorted it now.
Slughorn: Oh, Merlin, I do hope they’re alright now.
Harry: Yes, yes, fine. Now I must dash. Umm… secret Gardeners Club meeting same time next week?
Harry: But, Professor, aren’t tentacula horribly venomous?
Slughorn: Right you are, Harry! *Collapses on ground*
Slughorn: *Humming* Little shop, Little shop of horrors….
Slughorn: *Startled* Oh, Potter, m’boy. I didn’t see you there…
Harry: Were you humming the Little Shop of Horrors song again?
Slughorn: *Embarrassed* Yes..
Harry: *Brightly* Can I sing back-up?
Harry: Sir! You could be in so much trouble for growing that! Especially in a school!
Slughorn: You can keep a secret – can’t you, Harry?
Harry: If you bake it into brownies…
Harry: Professor, why is your plant petting my chin?
Slughorn: Well, you do have a very nice chin.
Harry: ‘And those are raspberries, and those are blueberries, and the one that you just ate is a poisonberry!’
Harry: ‘Professor, even though I know it’s technically correct, would you PLEASE stop calling Sprout’s plants ”magic weed”?’
Slughorn: Potter, I assure you that I do not know the lyrics to ‘Grand Old Ivy’. And believe me, I wouldn’t suggest that you inform Voldemort that there is a ‘Brotherhood of Man.’ As for ‘How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying,’ well, I prefer to play it ‘The Company Way.’ Now if you will excuse me, I am going to have my ‘Coffee Break.’
Harry: *Watches Slughorn walk off* I hope the house-elves are ‘Happy to Keep His Dinner Warm,’ because it’s ‘Been a Long Day.’
Harry: Err… Professor?
Slughorn: Yes, Harry?
Harry: I know I’m going to regret asking this, but – what are you doing?
Slughorn: My answers are limited, Harry. You must ask the right question.
Harry: Will I ever marry Ginny Weasley and have several children?
Slughorn: That, Harry, is the right question.
Harry: Hey, Professor! Knock, knock!
Slughorn: Who’s there?
Harry: Interrupting Harry.
Slughorn: Interrupting Har-
Slughorn: Open up… here comes the airplane!
Harry: Uh, sir, I don’t think that really works with plants…
Slughorn: ‘Harry, meet Herbert Screech – the most influential Mandrake!’
Harry: Professor, I’m not sure that’s the right wire.
Slughorn: Shush, Harry. This is a very delicate process. Don’t worry, I’m an expert. *Mutters to self* Now is this red or green? This would be alot easier if I wasn’t color-blind…
‘Not the Japanese Peace Lily! It only wants to bring peace!’
Slughorn: ‘I’ve told you this before, Harry. I don’t know WHY I can change into an armchair.’