CC #042: Week of August 3, 2003
⬇️⬇️ Scroll down in the below area to read all captions from this week! ⬇️⬇️
Boy: ‘No, honestly, it wasn’t me! It was the chair! It’s made of leather, and sometimes, when you sit on it….’
-Nick
Girl: How about a joke?
Boy: Ok! There once was a man from Nantucket…
Harry: *Whispers to Ron and Hermione* I told you they were talking about me over there!
-Casi
Hannah: Uhh… Ernie you have a little bit of chocolate on your chin… *points*
Ernie: *Wipes his chin, leaving a huge smear of ink on his face*
Hannah: Perfect!
-Sara
Ernie: Psst… Hannah! Harry Potter is the heir of Slytherin!
Hannah: Are you positive it’s him?! He always seemed so nice!
Ernie: Yeah, I’ve got reliable sources! …My mum’s hair dresser’s aunt heard it from her son in Romania, and he learned of it while dueling an old wizard, who swears that his half-sister’s cat saw Harry open the Chamber of Secrets!
Hannah: …Reliable…yeah…
-KatyFred
Student: ‘Okay, this is the 1st meeting of H.M.L.D.I.T. ‘How Many Licks Does It Take’, devoted to finding how many licks it really does take to get to the center of a tootsie pop. Please present your findings…’
-Steph
Girl: Did you hear? Bugs Bunny’s on a rampage!’
Boy: Why?
Girl: Lockhart never gave him his teeth back!
-Michelle
Student #1: Why is everyone complaining about speech bubbles?
Student #2: I don’t know, I myself think they ruin the picture…
Student #3: *comes in and sits down* Hey! They didn’t give us speech bubbles!
-Sam T
Snape: *sees the kids whispering, walks over, and picks up stack of papers* What is this?
Ernie: Creevey here took some random shots of the staff, hard at work… These are just the prints, sir.
Snape: *picks up the photos, looks hard, faints*
Colin: Well, gee, that’s kinda harsh… I didn’t think Filch really looked all that bad in a tutu…
-Jess
Ernie: Did you hear? It was Potter’s birthday last week. Did you get him a gift?
Girl: It was his birthday? I had no idea… Do you think he’ll get the Slytherin monster to kill us?
Ernie: Oh… I… forgot about that…
-Jessica
Ernie: ‘…To get to the other side!’
-Chris
Girl: What are you looking at?
Ernie: You’re Harry Potter!
Girl: No I’m not! Do I have a scar on my forehead?
Other Boy: But I wanted to be Harry Potter! I already had dibs on it!
-Christina
Girl: This is the spell that will vanish Mrs. Norris.
Ernie: Yeah, Potter and Weasley should know those Vanishing Cabinets don’t work…
-Elly
Ernie: Hey, did you know Disney bought out Harry Potter?
Girl: No way!Ernie: Yeah! Next thing you know it’ll be Harry Potter Meets Animated Rabbits and Ducks!
-Ryan
Ernie: Okay, Potter’s gone. This is the part where we over-obviously talk about him and he comes back and hears us, okay?
Hannah: Er…
-Jenny
Ernie: Okay, everybody… I learned this really funny game. It’s called ‘Duck, Duck, Goose’. I didn’t learn all the rules, but you go around tapping people on the head saying ‘Duck’.
*Three Hours Later*
Ernie: Duck, duck, duck, duck….
Snape: I am not a duck-twenty-thousand points from Hufflepuff for being stupid…
Boy: Okay, maybe this game isn’t so fun…
-Deziree
*Students noisily swapping gossip*
Ernie: …and I hear Snape wears a bra!
*All goes silent*
-Mucky
Ernie: *whispers* Hey! Look what I’ve found in this book!
Hannah: What is it?
Ernie: There’s a picture of Professor McGonagall when she was younger… she looks rather pretty!
Hannah: What year was the book written?
Ernie: …1850…
-Sam C
‘Haha, we’ve got Harry very good! He actually thinks he’s hearing voices!’
-Patty
Girl: Hey guys! Gryffindor Common Room, 8:00 tonight!
Boy: Wait, isn’t it the Hufflepuff Common Room?
Girl: We changed it. It’s cause Harry’s in there. All the girls think Parseltongue is sexy…
-Ali M
Ernie: Guess what? I am SOOOO excited!
Group: Why?
Ernie: I just figured out… I’m gonna get petrified! YIPEE!
Hannah: Er, Ernie…that’s supposed to be a bad thing.
Ernie: Oh…
-Emma
‘Give it a minute… wait for it… wait for it…. HA! FOUND HIM! There’s Waldo, right there, behind the giant green chicken!’
-Emily
Boy: Do you know…the muffin man?
Girl: The muffin man?
Boy: The muffin man!
Girl: Yes, I know the muffin man. That lives down Drury Lane?
Boy: Well…she’s married to the muffin man…
-Shannon
Ernie: Don’t look now! I think there’s a camera aimed at us!
-Melissa
Ernie: OK here’s what we’re going to do… We make the Polyjuice potion, turn into Ron and Hermione, and make Harry tell the truth.
Hannah: But… but… we’re not allowed to use that book! It’s in the restricted section…
Ernie: Do you want to find out if he really did steal the snitch or not?
-Agent
‘You know, your body doesn’t look anything like the one in this diagram in the book…’
-Aerie
Hannah: Boy, it’s stuffy in here, I could use some air.
Ernie: Well maybe Potter can help you, he’s got plenty of heir in him…
-Eric
‘…and then he said that Harry … what? Oh no, he’s behind me, isn’t he?’
-Hanna
The Hufflepuff House Legilimency/Occlumency Tournament
-Catherine
‘Pssst, what’s the answer to number 1?‘
-Chris
‘I don’t think it matters if you mess up your only lines… I heard they’re cutting this scene for the movie anyway…’
-NJ
‘…Hey, you! Stop looking at the camera!’
-Christine
‘O.K….staring contest… 1, 2, 3, go!‘
-Danielle K
‘Have you heard??? Harry’s taking remedial potions!!’
-Breezyde
