CC #495, Week of December 17, 2023

Credit: Warner Bros. Pictures


⬇️⬇️ Scroll down in the below area to read all captions from this week! ⬇️⬇️

Crouch Jr.: “Yes, I did.”
Dumbledore: “…Well, this is awkward. I wasn’t expecting you to admit it so quickly.”

Crouch: “Come closer, child.”
Harry: “Oooh, candy!”
Dumbledore: “No, no, sweetie! Not from strangers.”

Crouch: “This tattoo means I’ve been marked to go back to play Doctor Who for the 60th anniversary.”

Harry: “Professor, how could this guy fool you into thinking he was Moody for a full year?”
Dumbledore: “Look, I wasn’t paying much attention because I was so busy shouting at everyone throughout the whole year.”

Harry: “As long as we’re showing off our ink, why don’t we ask Professor McGonagall to give us a peek at what she has on her…”
McGonagall: “One more word, Potter, and I’ll turn you into a tea cozy!”
—Friend of Fawkes

Barty: “You know, Harry, as I am still your teacher, because you didn’t die in the cemetery, 50 points from Gryffindor.”

Snape: (to Crouch) “You know, that stupid tongue flick is why everyone always stayed away from you at the Death Eater parties.”

Dumbledore: “Listen, Death Eater.”
Crouch: “I’m not a Death Eater. This tattoo represents that I finished a 7-day juice cleanse. The skull spitting out the snake represents me purging my body of all toxins.”

Crouch: “Want to hear my tragic backstory that explains how I got out of Azkaban, reunited with Voldemort, and all that?”
Dumbledore: “I would, but the movie is almost over, so…”

Me showing off my new drunk tattoo to my only-slightly-less-drunk friends

Harry: “You got Hagrid to show me the dragons, arranged for Cedric to tell me about the egg clue, and bewitched Krum. Is there anything that happened this year that you weren’t responsible for?”
Crouch: “I had nothing to do with Ron’s dress robes. Even I’m not THAT evil.”

Me showing my siblings the totally awesome temporary tattoo I just found in the Frosted Flakes.

Crouch: “Ah, the traitor Snape. Don’t tell me your affiliation with Dumbledore is still based on your infatuation with that ginger Mudblood.”
Harry: “What’s he talking about?”
Snape: “Uh, nothing. Just ignore that.”

Barty Crouch Jr.: “…And that’s how I helped the Dark Lord return to power.”
Fudge: (offscreen) “I still don’t believe he’s back!”

Crouch Jr.: “Join the Dark side.”
Harry: “No. Never!”
Crouch Jr.: “You know that time I turned Draco Malfoy into a ferret? We could do things like that together.”
Harry: “Hmm, on second thought…”

David: “I hope I don’t lose this hand while battling a Sycorax.”




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Eric S.

Eric Scull joined MuggleNet in November of 2002. Since that time, he’s presided over a number of sections, including name origins and Dear Hogwarts, but none so long as the recently revived Crazy Caption Contest. Eric is a Hufflepuff who lives in Chicago and loves the outdoors.