Weirdest Character Descriptions from “Sorcerer’s Stone”
We like to reread Harry Potter on a regular basis here at MuggleNet (we even have a podcast, Alohomora!, dedicated to a reread of the entire series). Well, this time around, a few peculiar character descriptions caught our attention.
J.K. Rowling is known for her attention to detail, and these character descriptions are no exception. They are very specifically detailed, yet exaggerated to the point that it seems as if she’s put them in for some type of comic relief. Naturally, we thought it would be fun to put these mental images she creates onto paper. Without further introduction, here are the weirdest character descriptions from Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, illustrated by yours truly:
1. Dudley Dursley
Dudley looked a lot like Uncle Vernon. He had a large pink face, not much neck, small, watery blue eyes, and thick blond hair that lay smoothly on his thick, fat head. Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel – Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig.
2. Troll in the Dungeon
It was a horrible sight. Twelve feet tall, its skin was a dull, granite gray, its great lumpy body like a boulder with its small bald head perched on top like a coconut. It had short legs thick as tree trunks with flat, horny feet. The smell coming from it was incredible. It was holding a huge wooden club, which dragged along the floor because its arms were so long.
3. Vernon Dursley
Uncle Vernon nearly crashed into the car in front. He turned right around in his seat and yelled at Harry, his face like a gigantic beet with a mustache: ‘MOTORCYCLES DON’T FLY!’
4. Severus Snape
Yes, Severus does seem the type, doesn’t he? So useful to have him swooping around like an over-grown bat.
5. Rubeus Hagrid
He was almost twice as tall as a normal man and at least five times as wide. He looked simply too big to be allowed, and so wild – long tangles of bushy black hair and beard hid most of his face, he had hands the size of trash can lids, and his feet in their leather boots were like baby dolphins. In his vast, muscular arms he was holding a bundle of blankets.
Finally, I’d like to give honorable mention to another description of Uncle Vernon. It was a hard decision to make (Vernon the Beet or Vernon the Prune?), but ultimately, the beet won.
‘Ah, shut up, Dursley, yeh great prune,‘ said the giant; he reached over the back of the sofa, jerked the gun out of Uncle Vernon’s hands, and threw it into a corner of the room.
The imagery J.K. Rowling uses in the Harry Potter series is phenomenal and certainly makes for a good chuckle. We look forward to continuing this oddly illustrated adventure with you! Next time we will explore the colorful descriptions in Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Stay tuned!
