Metaphorical Potions

Professor Snape,

I (obviously) have a question that I believe you have the answer to. If, metaphorically speaking, you wished to get rid of a rather annoying teacher (Professor Gilderoy Lockhart for example), what would be the best potion or poison to either disable or kill (I’d be perfectly happy with the latter!) them so that one does not have to endure his incessant ability to incite blood-lust in even the most… peaceful of students any longer? Also, metaphorically speaking of course, which ones would cause the most suffering and which ones are the hardest to detect (other than the death or debilitation of course!) and trace back to the person who administered the potion or poison?

I do hope that you have had, and will have, a pleasant day!

~A Curious Ravenclaw.

Dear Curious Ravenclaw,

It would be improper for me for advise a student on how to disable a teacher. Additionally, I am in no way going to teach you an unforgivable curse. If one pays attention in Potions class one could obtain the knowledge necessary to concoct various potions of varying results.

I feel it prudent to mention that shortcuts to power meet the most tragic of consequences.

As for your grammar… I do love ellipsis. A lot. Apart form your excessive use of exclamation marks, it was the initial sentence ending in a preposition that was the most troubling. It would do you great justice to avoid that in the future.

Professor Snape