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  • Features / The Daily Prophet

Fantastic Beasts: Mooncalf Breeder to Blame for Crop Circles in Mexico

by Nicole Rivera · May 27, 2015

Overnight on Christmas Eve in Texcoco, Mexico, residents reported seeing bright lights in the night and then waking up to strange patterns in the barley crops. Not being the typical, geometric patterns, many (including wizards) wondered what they could be.

Crop circles

Earlier today the Mexican MoM released a statement that the culprit is now in custody. Artie Shepherd, American-born Mooncalf breeder, had a little too much Firewhisky in his holiday celebrations. He and unnamed friends Confunded the Mooncalves Artie had been breeding en masse for a prospective contract with Fantastic Beasts producers (or so Mr. Shepherd claims). The calves, who are shy and normally only come out on full moons, were set to dance semi-drunkenly about the barley farm.

The Mexican MoM caught up to Artie this past weekend when, while out celebrating the Memorial Day holidays, Artie again indulged heavily in his drink of choice. He confessed to a very pretty, half-Veela barmaid that he was the mastermind of the scandal. The barmaid happened to be the sister-in-law of the Head of the Mexican Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures.

All the Mooncalves have been taken into custody by the Ministry and are to be sent to competent breeders. Artie Shepherd is being deported back to America to await trial. No word yet on if the producers are in fact interested in procuring Mooncalves for the Fantastic Beasts film.

-Scribble Inkwell, Daily Prophet

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