11 Perfect Places to Hide Gifts for the Hogwarts House-Elves

If you’re a proud member of SPEW, you know that house-elves work under horrifying conditions (and if you’re not, you only need to pay two Sickles to join and you’ll receive a colorful badge). They’re not paid for their hard work, they’re forbidden to speak ill of their masters, and they’re not even allowed to own any clothing. You may be surprised to learn that Hogwarts employs (or enslaves, to be more accurate) hundreds of house-elves. Who do you think makes all that delicious food and keeps the castle clean?

The only way to liberate our fellow magical beings is to give them an article of clothing. Not all house-elves are as accepting of freedom as the late, great Dobby, so they might need a little extra encouragement. To follow in the tradition of our fearless founder, Hermione Granger, get out your knitting needles, crank out some tiny hats and mittens, and hide them all over Hogwarts for the house-elves to find. Here are some of the best spots to strategically place the clothing:

1. Under your four poster bed

You can nestle the gifts between your lost slipper and a discarded piece of parchment.

2. By the common room fireplace

The house-elves can find it when they come stoke the fire to keep the common room warm.

3. On one of the squashy armchairs in the Gryffindor common room

If the house-elves dare to sit down for a quick break, they’ll be surprised to find some mittens tucked in between the cushions.

4. In the Quidditch locker rooms

We all know how messy Quidditch matches can get. The house-elves probably look forward to cleaning up the muddy room after a particularly rainy day.

5. By the one-eyed witch statue

If you tap her hump and say Dissendium, you’ll find a passageway that leads to Honeydukes.

6. By the painting of fruit in the hallway 

If you want to grab a snack while you’re there, all you have to do is tickle the pear to enter the kitchen. Just be prepared to be swarmed by house-elves who want to make you a cup of tea. 

7. On your chair in the Great Hall

After the empty dinner plates disappear and the students are off to bed, the house-elves surely come by to tidy up the Great Hall.

8. In the prefects’ bathroom on the fourth floor

Maybe their newfound freedom will inspire the house-elves to take an extremely bubbly bath.

9. In the Room of Requirement

They’ll find it when they really need to.

10. On the ugly gargoyle by the entrance to the Headmaster’s office

Only a particularly daring member of SPEW would be brave enough to perch a little hat on the gargoyle’s beak.

11. In the library

Just make sure Madam Pince isn’t watching.

Wherever you decide to hide your gifts, just remember to give the Headmaster a heads-up that they might get a visit from some recently freed house-elves requesting a Galleon a week for their work and the occasional holiday. Surely they’ll be as willing to oblige as Albus Dumbledore was.