I Want an Acromantula for Christmas

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to the tune of “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas” by Gayla Peevey


 

I want an Acromantula for Christmas.
Only an Acromantula will do.
I don’t want a Knarl, no flaccid Flobberworm,
I want an Acromantula to play with through the term.

I want an Acromantula for Christmas.
I don’t think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won’t have to use our dirty chimney flue.
Just bring him through the fire
With a big handful of Floo!

I can see him now on Christmas morning,
Hatching from his egg.
Oh, what joy and what surprise
When I finally see his eyes
And the thick fur lining all eight legs.

I want an Acromantula for Christmas.
Only an Acromantula will do.
No Jobberknolls, or Hippocampususes;
I only like Acromantulasuses,
And Acromantulas like me too!

Madison Ford

I’m a native Texan currently living in the Pacific Northwest with my husband and our feisty dog Ellie. I’m a poet, a reader, and I host and produce MuggleNet’s mental health Harry Potter podcast, Beyond the Veil. I love rock climbing, hiking, and searching for seashells on Oregon beaches.