Through the Eyes of a Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes Employee: Letter 2 – Sprouting Feathers
Here is the second letter written by the very first Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes employee. Make sure to read the first one as well. We at MuggleNet finally got our hands on these and are so excited to show them to the world.
I have just been informed of the horrific things going on at Hogwarts! That toad is nothing short of a monster, and I have every intention of taking a little stroll back to my dear old school and giving her a piece of my mind! If she does anything to you, even looks at you the wrong way, you let me know immediately. Furthermore, a little Billywig has informed me there is, or at least was, a group set up to fight the power. If this is still operating, I want you to join right away. I know you are not exactly a rule breaker (that was and always will be my job), but rebellion is good for the soul… And that pink nightmare is not. My new employers have told me not to go into any more detail. Apparently, Hogwarts’s mail is being monitored. If that is so, stick it where the sun don’t shine, Filch!
I have been at work for a total of one week, and it has been one of the most chaotic weeks of my life, and that is coming from me. After finishing my first letter, I fell asleep almost instantly, only to be woken up by an ear-shattering explosion. Instinctually, I curled into a ball and covered my head. It is a good thing I did this as – a second later – part of the floor above me caved in, and I became completely submerged in wood and a sticky green liquid.
I was not found until the next morning when the Weasleys unlocked the store to start the day. According to them, they heard no such noise from their beds in the Leaky Cauldron. However, it was hard to believe them because the moment they locked eyes with me, both of them bent over backward, cackling in an evil sort of way. I don’t think it helped that I was sprouting feathers (I vehemently blame the green liquid).
They told me one of their newer projects must have reacted wrong in the middle of the night. That did not bode well for me, but being a steward of chaos myself, I was eager to learn their ways.
We are already receiving dozens upon dozens of order forms, most of them from Hogwarts! You guys work fast!
This is my new favorite way to start the morning: wake up from under an enormous pink Cloud Blanket (these will be on sale next month; I’ll try to get one for you) on the floor in the corner, stretch, and open the window for the five or so owls waiting patiently with order forms.
Fred and George are moving into the store as well. They are currently clearing out the little flat above the store.
The Weasleys are quite good businessmen. We should be open by next week! They sent me to Madam Malkin’s to be fitted for my uniform. If you are wondering how to spot me when you visit, I will be wearing a set of deep magenta robes.
By the time I got back to the store, both boys were in full pitch mode. Pitch mode is my favorite. I got to join them that day and helped come up with a new product that will be coming out this summer! Although I can’t say much more on the subject, I can tell you they come in various shades of pink and purple, and they sing on Boxing Day.
I am hard at work all day long: arranging the store, placing ads in newspapers, sorting everything, answering mail, learning how to create certain products, paying visits to different stores, stocking up on ingredients, and on, and on!
It is a good thing I am so busy because I am furious. Can you believe an entire government has bonded together to victimize a traumatized 15-year-old kid? If you see that Harry Potter around, make sure to show him some extra kindness. Fred, George, and I have sworn off the Daily Prophet altogether!
I enjoyed your last letter immensely. It is nice to hear from you so quickly again! When I was abroad, it would take weeks for your owl to find me.
Congratulations on your Charms test. I can see you becoming an excellent spell caster.
Mr. Weasley and Mr. Weasley simply say, “Give her hell from us.”
Love from your sister,